Sitting here on my couch, having a cup of really well deserved tea ( everyday chae), newly washed hair and watching 1st episode of season 5 of Orphan Black….
I want to take a moment and be thankful for all the good things I have in my life! and most of all my sweetest children who make me strong and positive because of their positive natures!
I was thinking that this weekend has gone so smooth. Lately I have been observing that after all the renovation, mess and misplaced things, I get a little stressed and that results in that I get irritated many times a day. Imagine that we grown ups have a tendency to be so stressed so think about children! How do they tackle it!!! It was a time that my son started telling our neighbours that he did not like going home because everything is so messy! Poor thing!!
Multiple times in the past weeks I have argued with my children, and they have argued back which stressed me even more because honestly you think that kids should do everything as they are told to but with growing age, they get different personalities and opinions which should absolutely be heard!
Children love to argue if they feel that grown ups are arguing back! In a hope of taking control we just miss the point and are caught up in this really bad circle. I have learned that all types of arguing is in fact not bad! You just have to understand if their arguing is positive or negative…
Things are luckily getting much better at home as some of you have seen bits of my new home ( after renovation) on instagram stories. I will try to do a post when we are completely done!
Anyways I was saying that I have understood that the more you show your children that you are in a mood to argue, they will keep on pushing your buttons. My advice : Don’t stay in the situation or you will get angry!!
I have started learning about myself and my abilities. Sometimes you experience things in life which makes you so vulnerable and no matter what the situation is, you start thinking from the same perspective. It’s so important to change your perspective. Nobody is perfect but to keep on learning about ourselves is such a brilliant thing. I happen to believe that these past days I have learned to control my irritation and started focusing on if my children’s arguments are positive or negative and guess what I have found out that most of the times, they have a point! And that alone makes things so smooth and I feel that we have so much fun and less arguing!
Making long story short, I am not an expert but sharing a few tips that might help someone because I believe everyone knows these things but sometimes it is magical to hear from someone else, so here it goes:
Listen to your kids and focus on their thoughts. Are they positive or negative?
Think often like a child!
Don’t argue and if you think that you absolutely are right..take a moment, go to your room and think of a good reply.
Play with them,evenwhen you feel it’s a silly game.
Treat them like adults and explain things to them instead of saying ” because I said so! ”
Don’t hang over them all the time, let them find themselves without you helping them all the time.
Guard your anger button and focus on influencing your child’s motivation.
I am working on these things every day but honestly sometimes you just forget what you have learned. Do not feel ashamed of yourself, you are doing a remarkable job and being an angry mom is sometimes totally ok!
And on this note have a good night:-)
PS. Thank you to all those who loved my last post and also those who said that they want to know more about me ❤